Thursday, August 7, 2008

I Am Longing...

Little P, 5 hours old!

For another baby!

We have been trying for another one since February, and so far we have not had any luck; it has only been six months, however, and it took us nearly two years to get pregnant with Paul. I hope it does not take that long again, but short of IVF there is nothing we can do to speed things up; we will just have to be patient and hope that all the planets align, or sperm meets egg, whichever is easier and more effective...

I told everyone after Little P was born that there is no way in hell I would bear another child, as the entire process was unpleasant and overall disenchanting; but here I am, not two years later, trying to conceive.

Am I stupid?

Did I forget everything I went through?

No, but I am inclined to believe that nine months of grossness was worth the human that is the end result, and I must also admit that I am rather selfish. I do not need another child, by any means. I have done my job and repopulated the earth with my spawn, uh, offspring. However, I want Paul to have a sibling, as I think it makes for a well adjusted family; and basically I just want another little person to love me. How bad is that? Contributing to over-population so I can feel better about myself. Nice.

Anyway, I am wanting a baby extra bad right now because there was a little guy at Paul's playgroup today who is just six months old and too cute! He is just now sitting up and learning to crawl, and it is an absolutely precious time that I want to re-live. Don't get me wrong, Little P is a blessing and a wonder every day and I love to teach him and watch him explore, but I miss the newness and the joy of an especially new human.

Well, if it please God I would like another baby. If not, I will be fine with my little Angel (who is currently pulling all of the pillows off the sofa and jumping on them).


Kat said...

It's amazing how strong that maternal pull to procreate can be isn't it? Then we come to our senses and remember newborn poop, labor pains, stretch marks and placentas..... but it always comes back to that tiny newborn with the corn kernal toes and hair softer than silk.......... *sigh* and this is why I have so many lol

U can't right this...... said...

I have baby fever too. Only I have an even bigger problem I need to find a man first, well a husband would be better. But in the end I feel your pain. Best of luck, my thoughts are with you, bring on the fertility god!!